Tonight Karlena was getting ready to leave for Awana and she said she wasn’t sure she wanted to go, I think her exact words were “these days I guess I just like to be around my family more…” So sweet, but I also knew that going would be good for her. And so I encouraged…
Because I understand darkness too
I have been trying to clean up some of my emails. Admittedly I am searching too. Searching for something that Isaac sent over the years, or I sent to him. Often, I reach for my phone even now to text him something quick and remember just as quickly that he isn’t there to receive it….
What are you putting your trust in?
James 1:3-4 says this: “For you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” I looked up the definition of steadfastness this morning and found this; firmly fixed in places; immovable; not subject to change; firm in…
When the normal is hard too
I spent the majority of yesterday and some of this afternoon starting the process of writing out thank you cards. I have only done about 70 or so, but I am making a dent in them. Karlena and I took a break to run to Walmart quick this afternoon for a few groceries. We were…
Beauty from ashes Lord…
I woke up thinking about things I shouldn’t be thinking of at 5am. I tried to pray and calm my mind but it wasn’t working….so I just got up. It is in times like this that I find myself saying “Isaac, Isaac, Isaac”….and then out of sheer desperation, because I don’t know what else to…
Counting Gratitude
Journal entry from this morning… Thinking about things I am grateful for is the only way that I can sleep at night. It takes me a long time to find rest and counting those things, praying to God and thanking Him helps to occupy my mind from other thoughts. In the midst of this terrible…
Purpose Yourself to See God
My journal entry from January 9, 2018 is hard to read today. In so many ways I wish I was re-writing that prayer instead of the one I did write. But before I share my entry I want to say this, because I am sure that there are people reading that might be asking “Where…
The Hard Story Part 2
My heart sank when I saw the reality before me. Something had happened. We didn’t know what at that point, but I was certain of it. Dominic does estate planning: Trusts, Wills and all the “ancillary” documents are a part of his daily work for clients. When Isaac turned 18 we prepared a Health Care…
The Hard Story Part 1
Several months ago I remember thinking that someday I hope I can share Isaac’s story. He seemed to be doing so well and I was certain that there was good that could come from sharing the difficulties he walked through. I never thought it would be in this way. I am coming here in the…
Complicated Grieving
That is what it says in my medical file. Two words that I suppose most appropriately describe this exact point in our lives. Along with other “Conditions” that I have had since my online chart began like post-nasal drainage, migraines and deviated nasal septum…now at the top of the list is complicated grieving. Well over…